So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
