chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
