what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Someone signed my nipple.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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