Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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