Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
