And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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