Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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