but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
