I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
