you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
