I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
