so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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