I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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