Don't you send me to vm
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
