i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
