maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
