But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
