how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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