i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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