I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize