if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
