She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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