She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize