with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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