Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I just found a bag of teeth...
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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