Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
