remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
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