pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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