The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
tell me about the eggs
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