I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
