Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
