So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
