Umm I'm too high to move.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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