Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize