we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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