you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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