you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize