So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize