You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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