I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
