Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
