it was like eating out sand paper
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
