so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
