The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.