Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(251): View more from Alabama

My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.

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(631): View more from New York

Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(785): View more from Kansas

he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"

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(734): View more from Michigan

Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.

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