just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
