she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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