At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
