North Korea, Best Korea!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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