she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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