I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize